There are certain times in my life when I am a mighty warrior, one that is so strong and fierce that nothing can stand in my way. I had just such a time a few days ago.
It all started out quite innocently. There I was, sitting unsuspectingly on my bed, snuggled under my covers reading a terrific Louis L'Amour book. I have never told you before, but I love the Louis L'Amour books and so my leisurely time spent reading those books in the evenings is quite normal and nothing seemed amiss.
It was dark out and I was savoring the softness of my favorite blanket and the terrific tale being told in my book. Now my super warrior instincts were quite alert and my eye twitched. I thought nothing of it till I felt this great big black shadow hovering over me. Slowly I lowered my book and looked to see what it might be.
My heart was ridden with terror when that great black shadow turned out be a most hideous brown scaled, large, bow legged bug perched primly on the tip of my big toe! Diane (she had been reading a book on the bed too) shrieked and flew out of bed. As she trembled by the door I bravely yanked my toe out from under that armored beast.
My eagle like eyes scanned the room in seconds and with the aid of my dear comrade in battle I attained a most fearsome trap for the beast. The trap of which we are speaking was a lovely flowery stationary box. With lithe feet I approached the beast and with all my strength I fought a gag as I approached it. My breathing was labored and my heart was beating frantically, but nevertheless my nimble fingers scooped up that abomination into it's trap. Diane is not by any means a strong-hearted warrior so she fled the room as I delicately perched that box containing the monster on the top of my little waste basket and with a magnificent leap I flew under my covers feeling courageous and worthy of every medal that could possibly be bestowed upon me.
My night was fitful because since I had not actually, dare I say it, squished, that bug it was still very much alive and all throughout the night I tossed and turned to the sound of the great bow legged behemoth clacking it's scaly shell against the sides of it's trap, trying as it might to escape.
Now when morning arrived, rest assured I found a warrior reputed to be one with a strong heart, to put that monster to sleep. (Thanks Dad if you're reading this.) And that concludes the tale of my awesomeness.
What a well-told story! It reminds me of the time many years ago when our house was still unfinished. One night I was peacefully dozing and reached down to scratch my leg. When I did, something SCRUNCHED. I threw back the blankets and shouted to my husband to put on the lights. It was a huge spider. Thankfully it had not bitten my leg. I completely relate to your panic. You handled it well! Quick thinking on that flowery trap you used.
ReplyDeleteOh horrors! I detest spiders even more than bow-legged bugs, thank goodness your husband was there to aid you!
DeleteYou are a most entertaining writer!! I loved your story! Write on!
ReplyDeleteThank you! :)
DeleteLovely tale it was too. You are awesome :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, I do enjoy writing!
DeleteIf I had been in that situation I probably would have reacted similarly to Diane. What a wonderfully written story.
ReplyDeleteThere is another great part to your story. Your wisdom saved you! If my guess is right, the brown bug that to me looks like an army tank, was a "stink bug." The great thing about it is your decision not to kill kept your room smelling fresh as a daisy. Once dead, stink bugs have an odor of maybe rotting veggies? You WOW, warrior.
ReplyDeleteAck!! I just googled a stink bug and you were right! I am so glad I didn't squish the thing now.
DeleteLast summer we had a stink bug plague of Biblical proportions in Maryland. Fortunately they do not bite or sting, but they are annoying as all get-out. I had one plop in my lap in church, and another time here was one crawling up our pastor's robe during service. Fortunately, somebody saw it, picked it up, and dropped it outside. If you have pull-shades in your room, you might want to unroll them all the way, as stinkbugs like to crawl into the roll and hibernate.
ReplyDeletethe worst is a spider on the ceiling....the very worst. or a housefly buzzing around in the dark
ReplyDelete